I Have Never Been In Love… Is This A Dealbreaker?

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  1. Bajan Bwoy says:

    Dear Still Searching Spy,

    What is Love… From the dictionary it is defined as a strong affection for another arising out of kinship, personal ties or sexual desire. Unlike infatuation which is seeing and wanting like a good Sunday dinner  for me Love is taking all the good, bad and indifferent of someone as you get to know someone on that level as they call it  and accepting them and their idiosyncrasies.

    In accepting them, they will also be accepting you afterall it is a 2-way street, however, for some, Love is she slept or he slept with me so that is Love. For me it’s more than the physical it’s across that emotional rainbow A – Z. For me personally it is being with someone and knowing you want to share the smallest or biggest things with them and likewise so that an understanding develops and as a man for me at that stage I am openly saying to that person would you do me the honour of being my partner as with Love comes Commitment and Exclusivity based on the time invested together knowing each other – 2-4 months of dating. I do not want to leave any assumptions such as we have been dating for 2-3 yrs plus and wondering is she my partner or is he my partner but in committing to each other the Love is seeded in a garden of loam soil and is looked after from seedling to first shoot to weathering a storm or 2 and bearing fruit – and repeat that cycle .

    Do not let this situation get you down and as we say every dog has its day and yours is coming and that’s not hopeful cliché but look at what you have achieved in life and having someone to share that with adds to it but is not the be all. Be at one with yourself – have your standards set and anyone coming into your life whatever the age will do likewise. You need 2 hands to clap but 1 hand can still feed you. The fact that you have not experienced love may also be due to the partners you have encountered… Were you just settling to have someone or were you both looking for the same things not just similar but the same things and most importantly seeing those signs and reading and understanding them.

    Here’s to your first and perhaps last experience of Love… Keep safe and stay Blessed.

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