Ask The People: Is It Important To Be “In Love” With The Person You Choose To Settle Down With?
For me, yes.
Not really, no.
At the start it’s essential.
It would be very boring otherwise
In my opinion, if you’re not in love before you settle down, then thats exactly what you’re doing… settling. I have to love and crave my woman.
To love and respect, yes. Be in love – no.
I made a mistake and left a woman I was deeply in love with. I wanted to live the single life, you know. But I soon realized there’s nothing of substance out there for me. I met women who were property owners, business women, women who need for nothing other than company. They can buy a man, but I dont feel good taking advantage of people!!! I’d rather help build a home from ground zero with my love, than live in a palace with someone who’s not for me!
Yes, 100%. Otherwise what is the point?! Material things dont last forever. ..
For me, yes. What I view as love is important. In general, I don’t think so.
For me, yes. I couldn’t see it working any other way.
Not really. In fact not at all. It is helpful, but if all you want is a solid family unit that lasts the years, companionship, the propagation of your genes and family lineage, and family to help you in your old age, all that is necessary is mutual understanding, respect and shared vision of a common goal and matching work ethic needed to achieve it. Having a few things in common would also help. I say this as I’ve seen many an African and Asian relationships last for decades, without either party being ‘in love’. The need to be ‘in love’ to have a lasting relationship is a relatively recent thing that has become more popular as we become less likely to be slaves of necessity, and are instead likely to do things because of ‘likes and wants’, rather than ‘needs and musts’. Being in love is a luxury that modern society has lead us to believe is a necessity.
We are Sentient beings, there has to be some benefits. Love may be seen as liability, but that’s what makes us human.
When it comes to paternity, I rather take my chances in marriage of love, than one of convenience.
The reality of the non-Western world is not the same. Granted, ‘love’ is a beautiful thing, it is one of the things that makes us what we are and it feels nice to be fortunate enough to be in love with the person we are with. But it is not a requisite to a successful partnership, and more often than not, people have forgone ‘love’ for what is necessary.
Yes, otherwise what is the point of being together?
I can’t speak for everyone else, but for me its very important or there’s no point.
Definitely! I couldnt imagine being with someone I didn’t love!
You never noticed that love is a lie between two people? A lot of people go into relationships thinking they are in love, later to realise it was lust. Love does not die out. It’s infinity. What people need to realise is that not all souls are compatible.
I couldn’t imagine living the rest of my life with someone I wasn’t in love with. I can see how it’s not that important though.
For me, it’s essential. You could “tick all the boxes”, but if I am not in love with you, I am staying single. Settling down with someone I don’t love would feel like being locked up, to me!
The basis should be more than just sexual, and love.
Well it would be a good start – sounds kinda wrong to say I’m not in love with them, but im gonna settle down with them. Like huh? It’s important I think, along with other things.
I spend about 30% of the time ‘in love’ with my partner, 60% of the time we are just getting on with it (life: working, kids, family) and 10% of the time he makes me sick! Love and respect him 100% of the time, through all of the above.
So what say you, Lurvlees?